Sexual Intellect Shines in The Afterglow of Orgasm

Sexual Intellect Shines in The Afterglow of Orgasm

Sexual Afterglow: That deliciously-exposed, lingering mood that separates the men from the boys, the women from the girls. Afterglow brings out the pure essence of human sexual bonding. The artistry of sharing togetherness after both lovers have reached the peak, la petite morte, the little death, the ecstasy that joins body, mind and spirit: Both Lovers.

Foreplay is great but afterglow is better. Years ago, during our ten-years working as sexual surrogates we posted this thought about afterglow on our website designed to encourage communication with clients. We received a response suggesting the reader did not understand what afterglow meant. That made us wonder why afterglow was not used more in relation to sexual intercourse. It means a warm cozy feeling: A physical and emotional mood at its finest with the radiance that occurs after orgasm. It happens to some extent with every orgasm with every person, even with masturbation. Regrettably for chronic masturbators the glory of afterglow can only reach its true magnificence if one is cuddling the person with whom they just shared that orgasm.

This is pure exhilaration and afterglow is entirely within our awareness. A moment before we were lost in the depth of intercourse. Lost in feelings so strong they created a different perception; we were encompassed in incredible sensations so demanding all other functions were muted.

Afterglow is not that way. It’s like a magical drug we feel as it spreads through every cell of our bodies, as if we can watch it flow as we feel its peaceful power. Pharmacies and medics would love to control this manifestation of nature’s extremely addictive, very healthy hormonal reaction. If drug companies could create the feeling of orgasmic afterglow they would be rich far beyond their present projections of obscene profit. Opioids would become obsolete. Cocaine salesmen would turn to selling gas-guzzling dreams to car addicts.

Afterglow has a profound reason for humans. It creates the desire to remain together, to bond after sharing; it insures us that sex has a far more reaching purpose than only reproduction. Afterglow is created by hormones that nature has provided so we will stay and not run away, after sex. Equally powerful in both sexes it lulls the senses into a mood of peace and security.

The magnificence of sharing afterglow is far too often destroyed by quick fix masturbatory-like habits: Guilty beginnings that originated in childhood when puberty demanded immediate release and after orgasm boys quickly zipped up their jeans and rushed outside to play. Here lies the curse of modern sexuality: The shockingly childish depiction that after sex the male tunes out. Such bullshit has been perpetuated by authors, movie scriptwriters and a majority of relationship therapists whose theories linger in the world of that first sexual release by their own untalented fingers. It is difficult here to be negative while reminiscing on the feelings of intimate afterglow but such gender difference is a learned dysfunction, a modern societal curse; a self-perpetuating myth that every couple longing for permanent togetherness must overcome. Overcome by using their personal intellect and not the misguided, mundane, cliché advice of relationship ‘experts’.

There is no reason beyond sharing to write of orgasmic afterglow. Those of you truly in love know what we mean and if you have a modicum of sexual intellect you will deny sterile gender distortions. During our ten-years working as sexual surrogates we treated over 3000 clients: Single women, single men and countless couples. Convincing post-orgasmic clients when it was time to leave was always a major challenge. After sex they (men and women) loved to linger and talk personally of their lives: Everything from their childhood to the day they met us. Talk in a manner they could never create sitting and facing the sterile expression of a therapist, or their best platonic friend. Certainly talking was part of the therapy we offered and it always flowed free after shared sex within the non-clinical, candlelit setting we offered.

Intelligent, sexually sophisticated adults in love do not want to separate after sharing orgasm. They want to cuddle, to doze, to plan dinner, to talk of religion, of politics and every aspect of what a shared life means to them.

Foreplay for the next sexual encounter begins in the afterglow of the last. Be it month, a week, a day or an hour away: All good lovers in love know this and use the lingering memories of yesterday’s afterglow to help conquer and survive in a far too stereotyped world of gender distortion. Cherish the mood of afterglow wherever you go.

Love is all about sharing when our world seems uncaring.

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